The Pain

Hello readers! It's been a while I had went hiatus in my own space in this cyber-world. I usually kept to a habit to blog at least twice per month on the beginning of the month and also the middle of the month, I broke the habit due to the massive workload that I underwent for the past one month. It was torturing but I think I've gone a little out of my mind.

The Pain - the title of my post with the picture attached. I'm suffering in pain that no one can understand the pain I'm undergoing.

Before I go any further, I would like to clarify that it was not the pain that I am feeling for my relationship. I'm having a blissful love life with my dear.

Pain is an unpleasant sensory & emotional experience that we human being feel whenever things do not go by the way we want it to be. I'm focusing more on the emotional & psychological side. Yes, you see people carrying a big smile where ever they go. You do not know is he undergoing some serious pain inside the heart. Neither you know how bad had he went through in the past. Each and everyone of us might filled with different kind of pain without us taking serious steps about it. Do you all really think life is full with only happiness? I knew the answer at a very young age & that makes me kind of pessimistic in the inner side.

For the previous one of a half month, it was disaster. Each and everything of what I have done didn't turn out well & that makes me extremely tough to pass all the hard times. I thought the beginning of the year was not well and it could somehow turn out better; it just went haywire in a way that is out of my expectations. There are people around who try to lend me a helping hand; sincere heartfelt gratitude to them. There are people who try to mess more things up in order to push me to even deeper to the ground, I also thank them because you people had made me stronger. Yes, it is indeed true that I would have respond to all the unpleasant circumstances in a very harsh way in the beginning, thank God I'm still able to control myself after that. I'm starting to be a little matured in handling all the objections, challenges and problems. Recently I read about a speech speaking about a very famous leader Mahatma Gandhi. It inspires me a lot.

This is the speech by Arun Gandhi, grandson of Mahatma Gandhi giving a speech on his late grandfather:

Ironically, if it hadn't been for racism and prejudice, we may not have a Gandhi. He may have been just another successful lawyer who had made a lot of money. But because of prejudice in South Africa, he was subjected to humiliation within a week of his arrival. He was thrown off a train because of the color of his skin, and it humiliated him so much that he sat on the platform of the station all night wondering what he could do to gain justice. His first response was one of anger. He was so angry that he wanted eye-for-eye justice. He wanted to respond violently to the people who humiliated him. But he stopped himself and said, "That's not right." It was not going to get him justice. It might have made him feel good for the moment, but it wasn't going to get him any justice.

The second response was to want to go back to India and live among his own people in dignity. He rules that out also. He said, "You can't run away from problems. You've got to stay and face the problems." And that's when the third response dawned on him-the response of nonviolent action. From that point onwards, he developed the philosophy of nonviolence and practiced it in his life as well as in his search for justice in South Africa. He ended up staying in that country for twenty-two years, and the he went and led the movement of India.

Last few days, it was terribly shitty for me & luckily it had passed temporary. Of course, I'm preparing there's more to come. I have thinking a lot lately exclusive of those mood-swing moments, I was relating everything together and thinking why I am here today at where I'm standing. I walked, I tripped, I fell, and now I have risen. I'm not declaring war to those who had pushed me down but I'm gonna say to everyone that even I have eye-for-eye justice, it will only made me feel good at that moment. Thus, once again credit to the speech above that makes me aware of no one can run away from problem and what is important now is how to solve the problem & look forward instead of doing unproductive things which are already happened and is out of our control. Therefore, I want all of you to be acknowledged that:

I'm evolving! :)

That's all for today, people. Cheers! I will update more, I hope. *Finger Crossed*

God Bless!

P/S: I would like to advice those who tried to push me deeper & make me fall to the subterranean of the earth, I believe in Karma. Do you? ;-)